Counting Days is easier than Counting Stars

The days here can seem either really long or really short depending on the time of year and what there is to do. Personally, I love Fall and Winter, because then I'm not dying of heat stroke and there is a lot going on. There is the carnival coming to town, the haunted houses opening up, Thanksgiving, Christmas (Hanukah, Kwanza), maybe even a little snow to get us out of school. But those things are not what I am counting down to. I am counting down to my book signing that is in three days.
I always ask people who've read my book what they think of it and everyone loves it (so they say aloud). My papa wanted to assure me that I knew that not everyone is going to like it and sooner or later I'm going to get a bad review. I know. I wait for that moment! I want someone to say it's crap so I can finally breathe out. I expect someone to say it's crap all because I think of it that way. I cannot even read that book anymore because no matter how good I think it sounds when I'm writing it, it makes me frustrated when I read it. But if they truly think that, they won't voice it out loud for me or anyone else to hear.
So, anyways, the book signing. I have put up posters everywhere and only have 22 books left to sell (family first \(0-0)/  ) but I still don't think that many people will show up. But if they do then that saves me from sitting there for FOUR HOURS. Hahaha. I know I complain. Honestly, its not going to bother me sitting there for that long. I just like to get out of the house. I just have to remember- You have to start somewhere to get to where you want to be.

-Remember who you are, loves
Love, SKW

Cooler than the Snow

Again the weirdest things continue to happen to me. I feel like the character in Dear Dumb Diary. This boy in my math class came up to me today and said, "Hey, did you write a book?"
I had to look around the room for a minute, because that boy does not look like he cares much for the written word. "Uh... yeah. I did."
He continued to say, "That is so cool!" before one of the pretty popular girls said, "Haha (my name here) everyone is catching on now."
0-0 What is happening? Writing books is cool? I used to be afraid to tell people I like to write because usually they would give me that *I have no idea why you'd do that but I'll continue to nod and smile* face. It was something I didn't want to talk about and now everyone thinks it is the coolest thing. I still get self conscious because of the genre and the way I published it. Every time I say "vampire" I get afraid that people assume that it takes after Twilight or The Vampire Diaries (not that there is anything wrong with them). Another fear I have is that I cheated with Self Publishing and if people learned that it wasn't traditional that they would judge me. I picked a popular genre and I am paying the price... but I wrote what I wanted to read.
Even the teachers have gotten weird about it. My math teacher handed me back a paper with a 105 as a grade and commented, "She writes books and aces math tests." Did... did I just do something amazing? I feel like the same person. I look like the same person. So how come people are starting to actually like me now?

Instant Celebrity... of Wonderland?

So here I am, the queen of the unknown, the girl whose name most cannot say or remember, the princess of going from silence to abrasive with a few wrong words. I know who I am to other people and to myself. To those other than me I can be a bitch (I know it. I can admit it.) or I can be the timid shy girl or the geek who loves fiction books and action movies and songs that touch the feels. To me... I'm a failure, I can't be consistent. I rot my teeth with coffee and cover the walls of my room in posters and bandana' because I want something more original than just painting it a color that gets old in less than a year. I see myself as a burden and a girl destined to go no where fast. But things are changing in odd ways...
Ever since I can remember no one has really cared much mind to me, because I wasn't full of drama and I really never did anything that was worth mentioning. Yet... May 23rd changed my social life (not much my pocket life). Those teachers and peers that couldn't even pronounce my name right now know who I am and have begun to take interest. They've all heard slowly that I have written a published book and actually want to read or buy it because they know me! Those girls that at one point didn't like me too much or were too pretty and popular to search the room for me now love that I wrote a book and have so many questions to ask me. Like what? What the heck happened? I'm not a "known" person. HECK! I'm not even a very good people person! It is just so weird to think that in four months I've gained something of a title for myself. "Author". Can I keep it though? Or will I continue to be the failure I think I am and ruin it all? I guess it's up to the Big Guy, but I must say... I don't think I could stop writing.